One of the tougher things about being an adjunct professor for me has been the difficulty in cultivating community, finding my place in it, participating in it. I suppose I didn’t worry about this too much during my last gig, but being in Philippine Studies, at least theoretically, presented an opportunity to do that bridging work between the academic space and the greater artist/activist community for Filipino Americans. I wonder now how idealistic and necessary is this goal of “bridging.”
Think about it: I am on campus one day a week to teach one course and hope that students come to office hours (I don’t require it but in the future, I might). I work 32 hours in the East Bay at my primary job the rest of the work week. This generally disallows me from having time with the other faculty members, and from the Filipino students’ organization and their events. And then there’s the very real possibility of burnout, given that work schedule, as well as the literary events in which I participate, and which I organize and host. I don’t know that anyone really expects me to do all of the above, but my work ethic is not only to work in my niche as an artist educator, one who promotes discussion about Filipino American literature and art, but also to find those gaps in our community work and to fill them. Now I am planning to enter into publishing, and I wonder if all of this is just too much for one person to do.
Maybe I need to revisit my work ethic, but maybe also more community members need to step up and become community leaders.
BJR: building community is always difficult, even when there’s more time than you have. It’s good to have high expectations, but not to be too disappointed when they aren’t met. Believe me, I speak from experience. The work matters; reception is always already (!) a conundrum. Then again, don’t burn out.
Thanks Susan, for the response and the empathy! Part of this is the end of semester tired speaking, and it’s exacerbating the ongoing frustrations of community work.